It’s that time of year again! In honor of the approaching holiday season I am posting a short story I wrote during high school. The short story is in the form of a letter written by a young child to Santa Claus. It is cute, spelling mistakes, and all.
“Christmas doesn’t come from a store, maybe Christmas perhaps means a little bit more….”
― Dr. Seuss,
A Compliant for Santa
I know you are veary busy this time of year, mommy said so. But I have a…complent. Yesterday during a trip to the mall for presents, not mine though I’ve been good, something… happened. But I was good! Promise! Anyway I saw you, or thought it was you. A child was sitting in your lap crying while I was waiting patiantly in line. Eventually I got my turn after the nose picker. Did you know its not nice to pick your nose in public?
I do know your real Santa, by the way! No matter what my stupid brother Toby says about you being a fake. I know the truth. Plus Mommy and Daddy said I was right. Ha!
But this Santa at the mall smelled funny and was really grumpy. I didn’t mean to bump his knee but did that matter? No. It was the longest few moments in my life. I scrambled away and watched his teeth wiggle when he laughed after our pickure. How gross is that? You know your special “Ho, ho, ho” should not be mocked. This dude was thin two. Are you short on cookies? Cause I could send you some of my Grammy’s special cookies with snowmans on them.
I may be on your naughty list now, but I was only protecting you! No one takes your place and gets away with it. Its…its… rude! At his “ho, ho, ho”, I think his teeth fell out with that one, and I knew I had to do something. So.. I sorta yanked off his priclky beard. Your beard is supposed to be soft, like a my baby sister Lillie’s bottom (right?), but thats a little strange even for you, Santa. In the end all the other kids were crying, the fake dude was cussing, and I got a time out when Mommy dragged me home.
Later my mommy explained that you couldn’t be everywere when you were needed back at the North Pole to keep those hiper elves under control. I guess I understand, but Santa, you really need to do those… crimenal background check things my daddy is always talking about after work. It apparently helps catch the bad guys – though I don’t know how it works. Maybe it will help you, though, cause Santa that dude at the mall was just n-a-s-t-y.
Toby’s pounding on my bedroom door. He is so annoying! Do you have a big brother or lil sister? Lillie just drools on me which I guess is okay. Toby can be nice at times, maybe he shouldnt get coal in his stocking like I asked you. I still want that doll, you know which one I mean. Now Mommy’s calling and Lillie’s crying. Gezze, people need some p-a-t-i-e-n-c-e.
Thanks, Santa! Keep what I said in mind.
Say hi to Mrs. Claus and Rudolph. I promise not to forget the carrots this year!